silence for months...

I have been silent for several months,blogging seemed to be difficult,brain seemed to become vacant suddenly,i hope to write something every day,but days pass on,without any intention.

I have reached the final stage of my formal(useless) education,till now i had something to do in life,but now the future became a mystery,i prefer sitting idle on the roof of the building and looking at the sky all the time,but the world doesn't leave me to live on my own terms,everybody has plans for me,and i am like a dead fish swimming along the stream.

people may be ready to hear my ideas on my life,but i myself don't know what i want,i am left clueless.Thinking upon thinking leads to greater confusion,this stage of my life is experiencing more thinking,i would rather reply that i am a thinker in profession than engineer or any stupid thing.

i want to grow up again,if given a chance.

i feel that i am viewed as a silly useless human being by others,or it may be my own view of myself,i hope to do something to justify my existence,but what to do?i wonder why people do the same old stuff of studying-working-marrying-moneymaking--- and such sort of things,and they keep embarrassing the people who are reluctant towards these things.

Being different and existing in this world requires some skills,which i lack,days pass on wondering about people who live on their own terms and make great things happen....